Give Me The Rock
this is fantasy basketball
Once again, from the files of PMad: The Boston Celtics
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Who can take 16 million, Wrap it in a sigh? Get shot with a stun gun, while he’s getting high? Oh, the Kandi man can. The Kandi man? The Kandi man can… The Kandi man can ’cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good…
The Celtics half court offense last season consisted of passing the ball to Paul Pierce and watching him take his guy one on one. Sure, there were a few fast breaks thrown in at various times, but that was the basic formula. It was a great strategy if you had Pierce in a fantasy league, not so good to actually win at basketball. That’s the Truth. Szczerbiak’s ranking below is a little misleading because he went from having a monster fantasy season on the Wolves to a fantasy afterthought on the Celtics. If I were a real man I’d run his Minnesota/Boston splits to prove that point, but, as you’ll find out, I’m far from manly. How did the fantasy version of the Celtics look?
2005/2006 Rankings
(12) Paul Pierce
(43) Wally Szczerbiak
(46) Delonte West
(170) Kendrick Perkins
(202) Tony Allen
(203) Al Jefferson
(216) Ryan Gomes
(279) Orien Green
(311) Gerald Green
(330) Brian Scalabrine
(433) Dwayne Jones
(N/A) Rajon Rondo
(N/A) Leon Powe
Additions
(175) Sebastian Telfair
(166) Theo Ratliff
Subtractions
(142) Raef Lafrentz
(265) Michael Olowokandi
(273) Dan Dickau
The only other non-Pierce guy worth talking about is Delonte West, who came out of nowhere to be the 46th ranked fantasy player in the league last year. Is that even correct? I have to take a deeper look. 11.8/4.1/4.6 – nothing that impressive. But 1.2 steals, 0.7 blocks, 1.2 threes, with above average percentages, I guess it all adds up to something. The rest of the team was a whole pile of fantasy crap, you know things are bad when you miss the fantasy presence of Mark Blount. Jefferson? Crap. Allen? Crap. Scalabrine? The red-hair stepchild of crap. Gomes? Ok, he put together a couple of decent months. Maybe fools-crap? I won’t even subject you to the horrors of Dickau and the Olowokandi (other than that horrible song to start this thing).
BUY
Sebastian Telfair – The Celtics got their man (at least their second choice behind AI). He’ll start, control the ball, the Celtics will run, it’ll be good.
Kendrick Perkins – He was actually playing pretty well late in the year before going down with a dislocated shoulder. Currently rehabbing, he’ll be back on the court sometime in August. I’m not advising any kind of crazy high draft pick here, but I can imagine Perkins being a serviceable second center – or at least a safer (and more likely to be good) pick than Jefferson.
HOLD
Paul Pierce – I wouldn’t count on Pierce being helped all that much from Telfair running the point, but Pierce will do his thing, no matter who the other four guys on the court are. 25/6.5/4, is my needlessly bold prediction.
SELL
Al Jefferson – Jefferson has logged way too many minutes on my fantasy teams over the past two years as I’ve been waiting for him show an inkling of his potential. He’s hasn’t made any kind of leap yet, and injuries and lack of aggressiveness will keep that from ever, ever happening. Learn from me, bail now.
Wally Szczerbiak – Wally, this is Pierce’s team, and as much as I like pretty white boys (as much as the next heterosexual male, I guess), you just don’t fit.
Delonte West – West was able to carve out a little fantasy home for himself by running the point (meaning that he had the ball when it wasn’t in Pierce’s hands). Playing a backup PG/SG is going to kill his minutes and value.
WATCH
The kids! Seriously, watch how the big man situation works itself out. Jefferson has the potential, Perkins has the body, and Gomes has the effort. And then there’s Theo Ratliff… ha. Telfair should fit in well with this team and it should be evident from training camp on, expect some big year from him. Also Rajon Rondo, Gerald Green, and Allen Ray are currently getting some mad props at the summer league games, not that it means anything. Try to keep up the act while playing with the big boys guys. They won’t contribute enough this year to warrant fantasy attention, but next year they could be something fierce. But seriously, watch the big men, someone’s got to play C and PF, especially after Al Jefferson fouls out in the 1 quarter.
Where I’d pick em (in a 10 team league)
Paul Pierce – 2nd
Sebastian Telfair- 7th
Delonte West – 8th
Wally Szczerbiak – 11th
Al Jefferson – 12th
Kendrick Perkins – 13th
Ryan Gomes – 15th
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