Give Me The Rock
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Sacramento Kings a la Rachel.
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Nels,
Truth is I never went to Sacramento. No offense to the Sacramentoites out there, but seriously, is Sactown a party city? I don’t think so. Sure Mike and his Posse try to light things up… but that’s not really my scene. Okay, you’re right. That’s totally my scene. But LA has a lot more famous guys with posses that are a lot better looking than M-Bibby. As you might have guessed, I’m actually writing this from my apartment back in Chicago. Yeah, I did go to LA. Yeah, I was too busy going out to really even think about basketball. What’s a girl to do? Sorry to leave you hanging so long. I hope these pics make up for it:
I know they’re not the hottest, and they’re probably too big for your dinky little blog (who thought that theme was a good idea?)… but there’s some boobs up in there. And they did make it to the finals of the NBA.com dance competition:
But their effort in the Finals was kind of the like that video of the Sonics against the Bulls in 96: Impressive, until you realize who they’re up against.
I’m sure if they’d known the Heat Dancers were going to totally slut it out, they’d have hiked those skirts and shorts up a bit, and done some presplashing with that soap bucket.
Sacramento Kings
(29) Mike Bibby
(31) Brad Miller
(51) Ron Artest
(61) Bonzi Wells
(102) Shareef Abdur-rahim
(109) Kenny Thomas
(118) Kevin Martin
(221) Francisco Garcia
(361) Jason Hart
(375) Corliss Williamson
(394) Vitaly Potapenko
(408) Jamal Sampson
(412) Ronnie Price
Additions:
(190) John Salmons
(295) Loren Woods
(N/A) Louis Amundson
(N/A) Quincy Douby
For the purpose of this preview, I’m just going to assume that Bonzi will be getting it up somewhere else this season. I mean, he’s not even listed on their Yahoo Roster.
So, who’s going to be getting it up for this season?
It’s Miller time! Okay… I just wanted to say that. Really, you can count on Bibby, Miller, and Artest to do what they do. Despite Artest’s long absence in the 04-05 season, he bounced back last year and showed that he is as solid as the 03-04 season makes him look. The number of games he’ll play though, makes him worth waiting on – he’s never seen action in more than 73 games a season. Miller played 79 games last season, showing that the sturdy, tough guy image is the one he’s really trying for. The 56 game season was the result of a freak accident, which can happen to any player at any time (though some players do seem a little super freaky). Speaking of not freaky, does it get more boring than Bibby? Only if he doesn’t have his posse with him. I’m thinking this year, RonRon can step up his scoring a bit to take the load off of Bibby, allowing him to take 1 or 2 less shots per game in exchange for a return to his higher shooting percentage. 43% is getting down there around not-so-hot territory. And the extra pass he makes to Artest for the look will help bring his assist numbers up.
And finally, Kevin Martin. With Bonzi Wells out of the way, Martin is all about the starting SG position (one of my favorite positions). Put him on the floor and the kid can light it up. Pure and simple.
Who’s going to need some Viagra?
Shareef. Sorry, but there’s just too much talent in the starting lineup to expect anything more than what you got last season from Shareef.
Who’s your booty call?
Salmons. He’s always shown potential. And he should be in line for any minutes that don’t go to Artest. He can fill in for you as a GF so he gets a little push up the draft board for that versatility. If you’re feeling him, you’re feeling him. We’ll leave it at that.
10 Team Draft
Bibby – 3rd round. He’s not 2nd round material, but if you don’t have a PG by the 3rd round, make him yours. He’s solid and that’s a good thing to have in a 3rd rounder.
Miller – 3rd round. He was a clear 2nd rounder when he was an FC on Yahoo. As just a C, he’s still a solid #1 center, but unless he can put up numbers like he did from 03 to 05, he’s not quite worth a second round pick.
Artest – 5th round. If he’s a GF in your league, I think you can reach for him in the 4th round. If he’s just a SF, it’s harder for me to justify that stretch.
Shareef – 12th round. You could take him in the 10th or 11th and get your money’s worth, but in the 12th you’ll have positive value coming to you.
Martin – I know I probably need to get my hands out of his pants, but I’m seriously all over Kevin Martin. The “experts” over at NBA.com didn’t even put him in top 150 in their mock draft. But then, they also had Amare at #6 and let Dirk fall to 7, while going with Iverson at 8. So, really though, if you’re sitting there in the 11th round and no one has taken him… I’m telling you he can put Bonzi type numbers – but less rebounds and a better FT%.
The rest of the guys you can leave on the wire. And that’s that.
Oh, and just so you know, I looked up Sacramento Kings dancers on Google and got a fucking wallpaper for like every girl on the team. That’s some good fucking search engine optimization.
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Thank you Rachel. It certainly appears the extra time I gave you paid off in a high quality preview.
As an added bonus, Fantasy Basketblog checks in with their preview of the Kings as well.
Update: Dropping Dimes’ mock draft puts Mike Bibby at 3rd pick in the 3rd round. And that’s in a 12 team league… so really that pushes him to the brink of the 4th round in a 10 team league.
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