Day 144 of 170: Mike Miller Uses the Power of the Headband for Good

Categorized as: Author: Patrick, Fantasy Basketball
Posted on: March 22nd, 2008

NBA.com is being a little bitch again and refusing to update their stats, so let’s roll on with a little GMTR special sauce. (If you’re not familiar with the GMTR stats, they mimic the ones on our player rater, and unlike NBA.com, our scores go into the negative just to emphasize how much we absolutely despise certain players).

Line of the Night: Mike Miller (9.4) by a GMTR mile (which I guess is about 4 points of rating). Miller had a spectacular game, scoring 34 points while shooting 12-16 from the floor and hitting 7 threes. He also had 7 boards, 4 assists, and a steal and block apiece. But don’t get too excited Mike Miller owners, the game came against – surprise, surprise – the New York Knicks, who allowed Memphis to score 120 points.

Fear the Man, Not the Hair.

Honorable Mentions: I still feel this “I’m a good player” thing that Mike Dunleavy (5.3) is pulling is all a ruse to have us waste a second round draft pick on him next year (although he hit 6 threes and had 7 assists yesterday on his way to 25 points); Caron Butler (4.5) – “Tough Juice” had his first efficient scoring game since coming back from injury, with 25 points, 6 assists, 3 threes, and a couple steals; anytime Timmy Duncan (4.1) can make his free throws (5-6 last night), he’s likely to end up with a fantasy performance as good as Jessica Biel’s ass; LeBron James (3.9) went for 29/12/5 but he didn’t do much else; LaMarcus Aldridge (3.6) had 22, 12 and 7; and my boy, the guy who is going to lead my current first place team that is still in desperate need of rebounds to victory this year, Troy Murphy (3.5), scored 22 with 15 rebounds.

Not Sure What I Meant with that Tim Duncan Line Above? I Think this Explains It.

Waiver Wire Line of the Night: I’m not going to lie to you guys, there is not too much out there considering there were 10 games last night. Shane Battier (1.5) at #17 is the first sort of waiver wire player. Yesterday, he scored 17 (but it was off 6-7 shooting) and had a couple steals and a block. Even Shane Battier needs to pass the 70% test for me to get interested.

After Battier, we hop to #25 where Smush Parker (0.8) could make an interesting pickup. He had 14 points, 7 assists, and 3 steals in 27 minutes for the Clippers while Dan Dickau started and got 31 minutes. And if you can’t beat out Dan Dickau for a starting spot, you shouldn’t be in the league anymore; Also, Mickael Pietrus (0.3) played a whopping 37 minutes for the Warriors, finishing with 16 points and 13 boards. He’s not going away anytime soon.

The Biggest Loser: Brad Miller’s (-6.5) night begins and ends with the fact that he scored 2 points off 1-8 shooting. Damn it. I have him in the same league I have Troy Murphy… now listen to me, Brad, I was banking on you getting me some boards so I could win this league. I need your boards. Don’t screw me. This is a money league. I will take you down if you suck the rest of the year.

Dishonorable Mentions: Jason Kapono (-11.3) was 3-11 from the floor and finished with 6 points and 0 threes. And you have got to be pissed with you spent any time or space this season on Andrea Bargnani (-12.0), Wally Szczerbiak (-12.2), or Darko Milicic (-12.5). They have been disasters in every sense of the word.

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